This weekend there was a neighborhood yard sale. Quite a few families participated, except for us because, as usual, I could not get myself "together" enough to put anything out to sell. I'm pretty pathetic like that (blogging about it on here doesn't exactly help). I'm always a mess, always disorganized, there is crap EVERYWHERE in my house~in the family room, on the counters, in the living room, on the stairs, in all of the bedrooms...blah, blah, blah... Well, this disorganization really does a number on my mind some days and Saturday, the day of the yard sale, was one of those days. I get to the point where I don't know where to start, my hubby was out clearing an area of the yard for a shed we ordered, and I was trying to pick up the house in between checking on the kids (especially the twins) and/or making sure my hubby knew where they were. It's not really a recipe for successful cleaning.
In between my checking and occasional cleaning Patrick, Sean and Caroline were running up and down the street checking out all the crap that my neighbors were selling. Sean, my most sensitive one, came back at one point to tell me that one of my neighbors had this "awesome glass thing with Mary and Jesus on it" that he wanted to buy. I told him that under no circumstances was he to buy this "glass thing" and that I DID NOT want it in the house. We have enough crap of our own that I can't get organized. He headed back down the street with two of the boys from the neighborhood and I went out to run an errand. When I came back he was carrying a brown paper bag and announced to me that he had purchased the "glass Mary and Jesus". As I was about to shoot back that I had told him I didn't want it in the house, my neighbors daughter commented with excitement that "yeah, he got this glass Mary and Jesus thing that's awesome!" Even with that, I shot back to Sean that I had told him I did not want it and he was not to bring it into the house. He responded that he did not buy it for me, he bought it for him and that he wanted to put it in his room. I could immediately see the hurt in his voice and in his body language.
Not one to let anyone miss out on enjoying the miserable mood I was in, I walked to the backyard to inform my husband of how annoyed I was that the kids were out buying other people's crap and that I was upset with Sean for doing what I had asked him not to do. He informed me that Sean had been all excited and told my hubby that he had purchased the glass Mary and Jesus for me. This I already knew from the way Sean had responded to my hearing he had purchased it. I had felt bad at that point, but unfortunately it took hearing it from my husband to make me really feel like the worst person ever.
I let it go and did not say anything for the rest of the day. The next day Sean and I were talking about an incident that happened with two of the neighborhood boys he was with. I was asking if they were being mean and he told me that one of them had said to him that the glass Mary and Jesus was the "stupidest thing he could have bought." My heart now fell to my feet. I fought back tears, told him that the boy was wrong and mean for saying what he said, ran downstairs and hung the glass Mary and Jesus (actually a stain glass picture) in one of the kitchen windows as fast as I could get it up there. I told him that I LOVED it and that it would be staying in that window forever~and it will (at least until someone breaks it, which is bound to happen around here). I then apologized to him and TRIED to explain that I am frustrated with how I can't get organized, but that I took it out on him, which was wrong of me. Even with that, all I have on my mind is how I cannot take back any of what I said to him on Saturday. He is the kindest sweetest boy and I know I made an awful impact~hence Worst Mother of the Year without question.
Now to go do what I should be doing so that I don't get in such a negative mood again (at least not for this reason)!
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